The Worst Green Gifts for Eco-Newbs

I’m guilty: I’m an Elitist Gifter. At least, I have been in the past. I just think whatever thing I’ve been using, or food I’ve been eating, or book I’ve been reading has been so gosh-danged fabulous I just *HAVE* to pass it along. My very own version of Oprah’s Favorite Things, if you will, but with less hysteria and sobbing. Well, maybe some sobbing—green gifts aren’t always appreciated.

Many of my eco-conscious friends jump at the chance to pay their green knowledge forward with a gift that nudges the receiver into a more enviro-friendly lifestyle. But choose wisely, dear ones. A false move might send your recipient flying back to their petroleum-based lifestyle with the vigor of 1,000 Oprah fans who’ve just found out they”ve won an electric toothbrush. You don’t want anyone passin’ out on ya.

The Worst Green Gifts for Eco-Newbs

Save the crunchy baked goods for your friends who are, well, crunchy

1. Hippy-Flavored Baked Goods

Maybe you think your flax-chia-seaweed-oat clusters are TO DIE FOR, but I guarantee those bad boys will be making a “‘swish” into the garbage as soon as you leave. Holidays are for indulgence and celebration, even I admit that. If you must gift baked goods, stick to organic, but traditional, ingredients.

2. Your Favorite Books About Green Living
Because nothing says “‘I find your life inferior to mine” than a slew of reading on how they pretty much suck at something.

3. Homemade Sugar Scrubs, Lotions, and the like
Unless you’re a soapmaker or a chemist, leave the lotions and potions to the professionals.
Making homemade concoctions for yourself is one thing, but these beauty items can easily inhibit mold growth or simply go bad if not used right away or stored properly. A “‘Green Holiday” shouldn’t be a nod at a type of fungus.

Not a gift. Period.

4. Plants That Need Planting
“‘Hey friend, despite your lack of interest in gardening and your very full schedule, I invite you to research the intricacies of tending to this plant native to our wonderful slice of Earthly paradise!”

5. Menstrual Cups or Cloth Pads
Just don’t. As tempting as it may be to introduce a young lady to the Wonderful World of Catching Shed Uteri, she’s not going to think your gift of period supplies is heartfelt. It will be creepy. And, really, how’s that thank-you note going to read? “‘Dear Aunt Sunshine, I walked into the bathroom stall today and thought of you…” So, just no.

6. Worms For Their New Compost Pile!
Oh, c’mon. Were you really considering this one?

Are you guilty of gifting any of these? What other no-no’s should be on the list?

photos via sxc.hu, flickr, flickr

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7 Responses to The Worst Green Gifts for Eco-Newbs

  1. Good Girl Gone Green December 10, 2012 at 11:30 am #

    Lol! It is true though….we don’t want o scare people away! :)

    • HealthfulMama December 15, 2012 at 10:13 pm #

      ;)

  2. Shonda December 10, 2012 at 11:31 am #

    I agree with all of these with the exception of homemade scrubs. I found a wonderful recipe on Martha Stewart and gave this as gifts one year to some of the girls in my life. http://www.marthastewart.com/265388/body-scrub
    I put it in a beautiful glass container, wrapped it in a pretty ribbon and viola, it was also very affordable.

    • HealthfulMama December 15, 2012 at 10:12 pm #

      I know there are great homemade gifts to be had, Shonda, but as the victim of my own body scrub turning moldy because I hadn’t used it quickly enough, I thought it best to mention the downside of homemade concoctions.

  3. Jeannette December 10, 2012 at 11:35 am #

    Hilarious! I consider myself a green hypocrite because I would have had the same reactions to any of those things a few years ago and now I’m diving deep into hippie-dom. There is hope that anybody can shift their thinking, but you’re absolutely right that the Holidays are a time to celebrate.

    • HealthfulMama December 15, 2012 at 10:11 pm #

      Thanks for dropping by!

  4. condo blues December 19, 2012 at 8:41 am #

    LOL! Great reminder you have to know your audience so to speak. I’m a deep shade of green but when it comes to gift giving, I always go with what the person will use and like not my personal green agenda. Although, if the meet in the middle that’s OK too.

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